我大概一年发作一回吧，一次持续半个多月或一个月。那一个月中每天发作，发作时疼痛持续十几分钟到几个小时，偶尔有天没有发作就很幸运了。
首先是疼痛，这个是最直接，最痛苦，最死的。真的很痛，没有这个病的人真的理解不了这种神经的痛，我前两天实在好奇，这种痛到底是几级啊，我为什么还不死啊，痛成这样是可以活的吗？搜索🔎一看，哦十级啊，那不奇怪了，最高级[微笑]。它不是一下子就到最高级的痛的，先是眼眶有感觉，嗯它来了，等待凌迟。这时候得赶紧吃药，吃药其实也就压制一点疼痛，还是很痛。我这次是左边，左眼渐渐睁不开了，不停的分泌眼泪，害怕光线，灼烧的感觉，一把烧热的匕首插进眼眶直达脑子。但人是清醒的，我可以听见一切声音，所有的振动都刺耳的尖锐。站着，坐着，躺着，都一样疼痛，我希望有人能直接把我打晕，让我直接昏倒，逃避疼痛。
然后是各种伴随性的折磨，焦虑和抑郁。可以说这一个月我每天都在干一件事，等它。贱吗？就这么贱。我不知道它什么时候会来，一想到要痛，就焦虑，吃不香睡不好，人毫无动力和生气。沉在湖底的石头，毫无意义。只有它来了以后，痛过了，获得了几个小时的冷却，我的生活才开始运行，我进食，我睡觉，然后等带滚烫匕首的地狱使者再次到访。
药物。简单来说，我有三种药物：一、止痛药（以散利痛为主）这是比较便宜，好获取的药，我得换着吃，不然很容易抗药，但是即便如此，止痛效果甚微。吃多了还胃痛想吐睡不着。二、特异性药物（曲普坦），这是针对偏头痛的止痛药，贵一些，有时会有点用，吃的时机很重要，吃晚了，吃早了都是浪费。三、辅助驱散或者让发作期快点过去的药物（具体有没有用，存疑），这是三甲医院开的，阿米替林（抗抑郁），这个药的作用我感受不到，不过它副作用我有感觉，嗜睡，我只能晚上吃，吃了非常没有精神，它好像只能让我没精神和力气，而不是助眠。
发现了吗，一药和三药有点冲突，有一天我晚上要睡前头疼了，我吃了两颗止痛药，止痛都是没多少作用，但是它让我早上六七点还是清醒的，非常影响我的作息。
有时睡着睡着开始痛了，醒了。有时刚睡醒，痛了，又多躺两个小时。有时出门痛了，无语。有时吃饭开始痛了，我午饭下午三点才吃。
写不动了，谢谢我还活着，敬不灭的每一天。
Zhao Ying's migraine
I probably have an episode about once a year, lasting for more than half a month or a month. During that month, I have episodes every day, and the pain lasts for ten minutes to several hours. Occasionally, I am lucky enough to have a day without an episode.
First and foremost is the pain, which is the most direct, agonizing, and unbearable. It's truly excruciating, and those who haven't experienced this condition can't possibly understand this nerve-wracking pain. Two days ago, I was really curious about what level of pain this is and why I'm still alive. Can one survive such agony? Upon searching, I found out, oh, it's level ten, which makes sense, the highest level [smiling]. It doesn't reach the highest level all at once. Initially, there's a sensation in the eye socket, and then it arrives, waiting for a slow and agonizing death. At this point, I have to take medication quickly, but it only provides a slight pain relief. I'm still in agony. This time, it's on my left side, and my left eye can't open gradually. It constantly secretes tears, is afraid of light, and feels like a burning sensation. It's like a hot dagger inserted into the eye socket, reaching all the way to the brain. However, I'm still conscious, and I can hear everything. All vibrations are ear-piercingly sharp. Standing, sitting, or lying down all bring the same level of pain. I wish someone could just knock me unconscious, allowing me to collapse and escape from the pain.
Then came various accompanying torments, anxiety, and depression. It can be said that I have been doing one thing every day for the past month: waiting for it. Is it cheap? So cheap. I don't know when it will come. The thought of pain makes me anxious, unable to eat or sleep well, leaving me powerless and lifeless. I am like a stone sinking to the bottom of a lake, meaningless. Only after it comes, after the pain passes, and after gaining a few hours of respite, my life starts to function again. I eat, I sleep, and then wait for the hell messenger with a hot dagger to visit again.
Medications. To put it simply, I have three types of medications: First, analgesics (mainly paracetamol). These are relatively cheap and easy to obtain. I have to switch between them, otherwise I would easily become resistant to them. However, even so, the analgesic effect is minimal. Taking too much can cause stomach pain, nausea, and insomnia.
Second, specific drugs (triptans) are analgesics for migraines. They are more expensive, but sometimes they can be somewhat effective. The timing of taking them is important. Taking them too late or too early is a waste.
Third, medications that assist in dispersing or speeding up the passing of the acute phase (it's questionable whether they are effective). These were prescribed by a tertiary hospital. Amitriptyline (antidepressant). I can't feel the effect of this medication, but I can feel its side effects, which include drowsiness. I can only take it at night, as it makes me feel very lethargic. It seems to only make me feel listless and weak, rather than helping me sleep.
Did you notice that there's a conflict between the first and third medications? One night, I had a headache before going to bed, so I took two painkillers. They didn't provide much relief, but they kept me awake until six or seven in the morning, which seriously disrupted my daily routine.
Sometimes, I start feeling pain while falling asleep and wake up. Sometimes, I wake up feeling pain and have to lie in bed for another two hours. Sometimes, I feel pain when I go out, which is quite frustrating. Sometimes, I start feeling pain when I eat, and I only have lunch at 3 pm.
I can't write anymore. Thank you for being alive, and I pay tribute to every unextinguished day.